A.G. Flowers

Good Morning Adventurers,

So, after waiting in anticipation, I have finally received the feedback from the contest. Sadly, I don’t think I made it past the first round, but I do appreciate the results that I did receive. To provide context, the contest that I entered was a “Manuscript” Challenge. The submission guidelines were essentially the first five pages of a manuscript and nothing else. So let me share with you guys a few lines from the judges feedback.

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This story had such great pacing and tension, and I was hooked from the opening lines! The immediate threat of the sinkhole opening up under the protagonist definitely had the story starting in medias res, and I was very curious about how we’d ended up in this situation – the protagonist didn’t seem too startled by this turn of events, which was very interesting. Is this a regular occurrence for them?

These are the first lines of their review, and I can’t say how happy it makes me to know that I was able to get the pacing down. That is genuinely something that I worry about when I work on a larger form of writing. Plus, the judges questioning whether or not this is a regular occurrence for the character gives me a fun idea to play around with in the future.

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 I assumed this was a secondary world fantasy, but I wasn’t really grounded in the character’s circumstances, which made it difficult to care about their predicament – was there an opportunity to introduce the reader in the character in some capacity? Perhaps some exposition that could explain how they ended up in this situation, what they wanted, and what they had at stake?

I grabbed this part from the middle of another paragraph because I think this highlights the largest oversight in my submission. When rewriting this opener, I was trying to write the five pages as a complete chapter. I was more focused on completing the chapter, and I abandoned these details in order to submit it to the contest on time. So I agree with the judges words that there is a missed opportunity here to take a few words and ground the reader down into the story. Just a few paragraphs explaining why the character was there in the first place. So in other words, more exposition like they had suggested.

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I’d love to know if this character was an explorer of some kind, or perhaps this world’s equivalent of an archaeologist – could this have been detailed as they noted the features of the structure they’d fallen into?

This was another suggestion that they had made, and I honestly like and agree with it. It also means that I may have to rewrite the main character into more of an explorer, but that’s fine with me. In fact, that may make him a bit easier to write and fit into the setting that I am developing. Either way, I appreciated the suggestion.

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As of right now, I am debating on whether or not I want to post what I had submitted in this contest here on my website. Partially because there is a small part of me that is insecure and wary about sharing things online. However, I also know that for the most part, the writing community is really supportive. So as I finish typing up this post, I’ll most likely have come to a decision. So if anything, keep an eye on my projects because that is where I’d post the link to the first five pages if I do end up posting it.

Until then, have a blessed day and continue seeking out adventure in everything that you do.